Felix Upton on June 4, 2023
Pro wrestling can be a ruthless business at times, and this story might not be for the easily triggered. An old ROH uncensored interview has resurfaces where CM Punk and Colt Cabana told a very interesting story.
CM Punk and Colt Cabana are not friends anymore, but there was a time when they spent a lot of time on the road together. They also had a way to make towns and not pay for transportation, because Bikini Girl was around.
In a recently resurfaced interview that popped up on Reddit, CM Punk and Colt Cabana told the story about Bikini Girl, a girl who just wanted to make it in pro wrestling, but they just used her for gas money and snacks.
CM Punk: “The other unofficial member of the Gold Bond Mafia, of course if you ask any of us she’s not a member, but to her- this is her world. I couldn’t even tell you her real f*cking name. (Punk holds up a picture of him groping a woman’s breasts) She is the “Bikini Girl”. That is strictly what we called her”
Colt Cabana: “And when we first saw her, I’ll be honest, me and Chuck E Smooth were like ‘oh this chick’s totally hot, this chick’s totally hot’ – and we’ll tell the story of how we spent years with her- and at the end she was the ugliest most disgusting girl of all time. I was grossed out by her.”
CM Punk: “I HATED her”
Colt Cabana: “Everything that was about her was disgusting. But now the fact that – This proved the difference between some of the young guys growing up, and some of the guys – We understood the work of it. You know, how it’s a work, how it’s a business. And we got this girl every single week with her family van to drive us 300 miles every week. Not putting 1 mile on our car and us knowing that. Trying to not pay for gas as much as we could. And she loved- she wanted to train. Like maybe we got her in the ring once and, you know, made sure to hurt her so she’d be out another 2 months (Punk begins laughing) but she’d still be with us ‘because she was dedicated’ and uh-“
CM Punk: “The point is- and you know this is gonna sound real degrading – but like, most women in the business are rats. You know I mean that’s a hard fact of life that you eventually realize and it was like – she got in the business. And at the time she was like “Oh I wanna be a wrestler & I wanna train” — I never saw her get in the ring. You know, like it just never happened. And when we did get in the ring, alls it took was a good forearm shot and then – that was it – she was done. So we always kinda kept her in check (Colt starts laughing), but she would be “Bikini Girl”. She would wear a bikini and walk around the ring when the show started & take people’s ring jackets and you know, sunglasses.”
Colt Cabana: “We’d make sure there was a spot for her, but- you know not a ‘spot’ but just whatever so she could drive us and no one would be spending- putting miles on our cars”
CM Punk: “No miles on our car. No gas out of our pocket. You know what I’m saying, because it was like – you know we weren’t getting paid more than you know sometimes 30-40-50 bucks from Ian and stuff like that. And we certainly weren’t getting trans’d (transported?) – so it was always like me, Chuck E, Cabana, Prazak, maybe occasionally somebody else. We’d always fill up that “Bikini Van”, you know & drive it down. And- how many tickets would she get? None of us would ever drive. “Oh can one of you guys drive?” …”Nahh you know I’m really tired”, “i just got off of work” I mean, that was the thing where maybe somebody, a bunch of other young guys would probably just try to gangbang her and that’d be the last you’d see of her. We tried to get blood from that stone & we squeezed it like everything she was worth.”
Colt Cabana: “She’d always have like snacks for us too.”
CM Punk: “Yeah. Yeah. You know she’s like one of these girls that who like her aspiration in life was to have a kid!
Colt Cabana: “Mom. She wanted to be a mom.”
CM Punk: “She wanted to be a mom so she thought she was kinda like the den mother and we let her f*ckin believe that. You know, (puts fingers to head like devil’s horns) “Evil” you know blah blah blah. And we would just randomly try to get her booked on shows whenever we could so we didn’t have to drive.”
It should be noted that CM Punk and Colt Cabana made no reference to having sex with Bikini Girl. Punk said that “while some guys might gang bang her” and toss her to the side, they went a different way and just used her for money, and then made sure that she didn’t enjoy any of her time in the ring.
It might be important to note that the caption for that Reddit post was: “I’m not saying the woman in this story was going to be the next Jamie Hayter, but we’ll never really know because of the way she was treated when it seemed like all she wanted was acceptance and some sort of safe ‘in’ to the wrestling world.”
This is just one of many stories from pro wrestling’s past that could resurface in a new light today. Only time will tell what comes up next, but CM Punk and Colt Cabana probably don’t appreciate this. You can check out the interview below.
What’s your take on this pro wrestling story? Sound off in the comments!
June 4, 2023 10:15 am
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